Genii Wranglers
by InkstainedHands1177
Summary: John Watson and Sebastian Moran find that they have a kindred spirit. ((I do not own Sherlock Homes, the books, the movies, or the TV series.))


John sighed as he sat down on the bar stool. He nodded to the bartender. "I'll have my usual."

"Sure thing."

He stared at the smooth wooden surface of the bar and thought of nothing in particular. He smiled slightly. Sherlock was at the Yard. John didn't have to go. It was Greg's turn to deal with Sherlock.

"Excuse me, mate. Are you, by any chance, John Watson? Sherlock Holmes' handler?"

He turned his gaze over to the man sitting next to him. "Yeah. Who're you?" John was wary. The man smiled and raised his hands soothingly.

"Nobody right now. I'm on break. I'm Sebastian Moran." He shrugged. "Jim Moriarty's body guard." The silent _and handler_ was obvious to John.

Raising an eyebrow, John nodded. "Pleasure to meet you. You're on break, you say?"

"Yep. We don't have to do anything at all. I just thought I should take a look at the brave soldier in the shadows." He winked conspiratorially. "The one who holds the actual leash."

John snorted and nodded his thanks to the bartender, picking up his drink and sipping it. "Here's to our continued sanity."

Sebastian laughed and clinked his glass with John's. He raised an eyebrow. "I'm not fishing for information. You can tell me to jog on, if you want to, but what is it _like_ staying in the _same_ flat with Sherlock Holmes?" Incredulity was clear in Sebastian's voice.

John scoffed slightly. "Probably more dangerous than working with Moriarty. You wouldn't _believe_ the things I have to put up with."

Sebastian shook his head. "Buddy…Moriarty is no cake walk either. I think Sherlock would be easier to control."

John shrugged. "Have you walked into a flat with Jim Moriarty shooting the wall with _real_ bullets _because he was bored_?"

Sebastian paused and then shook his head. "No." His eyes lit up. "But have _you_ found an inside-out mouse in your shoe, put there by Jim to test how easy you get startled?"

John chuckled. "Have you ever found a head in your fridge?"

Sebastian blinked in surprise. "Actually yes. It was the head of our English teacher."

"Our?"

"Jim and me went to Uni together. How we met actually."

John goggled at him. "You have to put up with Moriarty _that long_?!"

Seb nodded in a long suffering sort of way. "I honestly look back and don't recall how I was able to do it."

John snorted and took another swallow of his drink. "I remember once, when Sherlock got slapped by a girl. I had to explain to him how it was 'a bit not good' to tell a woman that her body was disproportional to her head."

Seb started guffawing. "I had to stop Jim from killing a girl for slapping him. He still doesn't understand that telling a girl that 'the extra curves and weight look good on her' _isn't_ actually seen as a compliment."

John snorted his drink, coughing and laughing so that tears came to his eyes. Sebastian slapped him on the back to help him clear his airways.

"Thanks." He took a wheezing breath. "They're insane, you do know, right?"

Seb sighed and nodded. "But we still stick to them. Why is that?"

John shook his head. "Loyalty." He looked Seb up and down and then smiled. "You a soldier too?"

He nodded proudly. "Joined after Uni."

"Me too."

Seb raised an eyebrow. "What division?"

"Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers. Captain and medic."

Sebastian's eyes bugged out. "My pal was in that division!"

John frowned. "What's his name?"

"Derrick Orland."

John frowned and then smiled. "Got a bullet to the lung. Saved his life. He was sent back to England. Honorably discharged. The same happened to me after I got shot in the shoulder."

Seb nodded. "I was in black ops. Jim got me out. Faked my death."

John nodded. "Another drink?"

"Gladly! Thanks." They smiled at each other and ordered another round. Seb paid for the first round. John paid for the second.

John sighed and nursed his glass between his hands. "You know, we're going to have to be enemies after this."

Seb frowned. "Right…" He looked at John.

John looked back at him. "One day it's gonna explode."

Seb nodded slowly. "I don't want to shoot you."

"And I don't want to be shot." John grinned. Seb slowly smiled back.

"We can try and make this work out."

John smiled and nodded. "Okay."

They finished their drinks in companionable silence, enjoying their short break before going back to the arduous task of genii wrangling.

 **This just came to me. ; )**

 **InkStainedHands1177**


End file.
